This is all brand new to me and kind of done on a whim. I don't know what direction I want this blog to go in, so that's why I just named it my name. It's just me. I've been so inspired by so much lately and I felt like I was just brimming with ideas and images and thoughts and words, so what better way than to get with the times of 2009 and blog. Just a warning: I'm random, scattered, and a tad strange, so bear with me. This is an entry to the way I really think, the way my mind really works. There's a feeling of anonymity, but also vivid exposure as I convey my thoughts, yearnings, longings, and all those other words that mean "how I feel today."
Stay tuned...if u dare. It won't be easy (probably for u to read or for me to write), but I do believe it will be entertaining.
Ok.
I've been talking to one of my oldest friends tonight for like 2 hours. We've been kind of out of touch for a while and I'm actually really happy and fulfilled with the conversation that we've had. I've missed our talks dearly (We've always been able to talk about any and every single thing that could possibly be talked about.) and I hope that tonight is the start of that again. We've been friends since we were 10 and it would be a shame to let a 13 (almost 14 year) friendship dissolve for no real reason. Love u RR ;)
Since I've been alone ALOT lately, I'm really appreciating the people in my life that don't ever seem to really disappear. Those are the people who I WANT in my life and that I actually do need. It's only a handful, but I've never been one of those people to need (or want) crowds of people around. I miss them all being here in loner/loser land and want to be surrounded by loved ones more and more as I get older. I get really nostalgic and crack open the old photo albums, love letters, and yearbooks from the "better days" when my life was overflowing with happiness. Why can't I get back to that feeling? Why did I ask that question?...I know exactly why...shitty experiences, growing older, and the absences or addition to certain people that have inadvertently affected me without my permission. But it is my goal in my 20s to heal and mend stuff and this is a great way to get it ALL out and be happy with who I am and to let go of... tHe FeAr :)
Until next time...
